Because Bill and Melinda won't invite me over

whoops

2007-06-04T09:32:00.000+05:30

so sorry it has taken me so long to update, but it has been a busy month and i have lots to report. since i am feeling particularly nerdy, i am going to do it in outline form! :)

1. I just spend a week traveling around Bangkok and Hong Kong. So fun! I officially LOVE LOVE LOVE Hong Kong. It's a perfect blend of NYC and San Francisco, but so much prettier than either! Bangkok was nice too- we drank lots of fresh orange juice laced with sugar and lime juice- quite tasty, and the Buddhist temples were quite nice too. But HK was just lovely.

This picture is from the Golden Temple (Golden Palace? I don't remember). So my forgetting the name is not reflective of the beauty of this place. Even though it was hot and humid, and my friend and I were grumpy after a certain incident with 2 Thai ladies, we still found it amazingly pretty and took about 100 pictures between the 2 of us. We actually bumped into a group of Korean tourists, and they insisted on taking lots of pictures with us! So somewhere in Korea, half a dozen families have framed pictures of themselves with an Indian girl and a Pakistani girl posing in front of the Golden Temple in Bangkok! I was super entertained by the whole situation, so I had a picture of us taken with one of the couples too. : )

Jumbos! We're everywhere. : )

2. I changed houses because my first landlady was horrible. My new living situation is 100000x better. My "landlady" takes amazing care of me- fresh juice every morning, fresh jalebi on sundays (jalebi is a deep fried sweet that Indians eat in the morning as a treat and it tastes so good right out of the frying pan), etc. So that's good news...

3. i was supposed to go to jaipur last week, but there have been major riots across rajasthan because the gujjars want to change their caste designation so they can have better educational and economic opportunities. the situation is getting a little out of hand- it is impossible to travel by rail or road in rajasthan and part of gujarat, so the only way out is by air. the riots are also spreading to delhi, and there are threats from the gujjar community in jammu and kashmir to join the riots if changes are not made. it is quite a volatile situation and I, naively, did not realize how much caste politics continues to shape India today until I began working in India this past January. the quotas, comparable to affirmative action policies in the US, are a huge issue in India, because overpopulation and lack of general goverment support make it very difficult for under-privileged people and groups to gain access to jobs and education. really fascinating stuff and really frustrating too because politicians blatantly use these caste politics to their advantage.

Ok off to deal with more corrupt UP government officials. Woohoo! I dont know if I can actually write that, b/c I feel like someone is going to arrest me for mocking them, but at the pace the UP gvt currently works, I feel pretty confident that it wont happen for at least 15 more years.

:)

relief!

2007-05-08T13:29:00.000+05:30

Today is definitely a good blogging day, because I have lots of happy thoughts and general revelations on life! My friend, Gul, came to Lucknow, and due to her influence, I actually went around Lucknow to look at some of the sights. Up until now, all I knew were the markets and the restaurants and vegetable vendors (shock!), but now I've seen all the sights too!

My Day in Amritsar = The Day of Many Many Mixed Lime Sodas
After 2 days in Lucknow, we went to Delhi, spent the day running errands and eating Italian food and cake, and then took an overnight train to Amritsar, Punjab. It was so unbelievably hot, so we would go the sights, then take a break to drink lime sodas in any AC restaurant we could find! We went with 2 other friends, which was a good idea since Amritsar is not the most exciting city, but it has 2 main attractions that we really enjoyed. The first sight is the Golden Temple, built by Sikhs and considered to be one of their most sacred sights, symbolic of freedom and spiritual independence (thank you wikipedia). We actually went to see the Temple 3 times- at 7 Am, at 1 PM, and at 9 PM. It was so beautiful every time we saw it, but I thought it was stunning at night. The temple was lit just enough for the golden dome to shine, but it was dark enough that it reflected from the moonlight. Stunning. The picture doesn't do it justice, but you can get a vague idea of it's beauty and magnificence! Just a side note- I managed to get yelled at 3 times when I was at the temple by tall Punjabi men carrying really sharp spears. Scared the hell out of me! There was also a Hindu temple built as an exact, though substantially inferior, copy of the Golden Temple. It was really bizarre because Hindu temples don't usually look like the Golden Temple, so it's unclear who and why someone thought it was a good idea to make an exact replica of the Golden Temple with Hindu deities instead of the symbols of Sikhism.

The other attraction was the Border Ceremony which takes place along the border of Pakistan and India. Somehow it managed to be really fun and interesting and eerily disturbing all at once. So we showed up at the border where there are 2 elaborates gates- 1 gate is the India side which is where we sat, and then there was a huge gate. On the other side of the gate was the Pakistani gate where there are Pakistani spectators. I included a picture of Pakistan's gate just because it was prettier than the Indian gate. The border ceremony was between the guards on both sides of the ceremony, they marched towards each other and opened gates between the countries as they took down the flags of their respective countries. The Indian side was super rowdy, with people chanting, "Jai Mata Di," "Hindustan Zindabad," and "Vande Mataram"; dancing to popular Bollywood songs, and overall national sentiments. There dozens of popcorn vendors and I heard some less than positive things being said about Pakistan and the Pakistan soldiers from my fellow Indian viewers. It was fun because the entire event was designed like a sporting event, but it was disturbing because when the gates were closed again, people on both sides rushed the gates and were calling out to people on the other country's side. Really disturbing to see people who formerly lived side by side separated by something arbitrary like a gate and clumsily drawn line in the dirt.

We returned to Delhi that same night, I spent the day in Delhi, and then returned to Lucknow that night. I went to the wrong train station in Delhi, and ended up having to run to the other side of the train station, hop on the metro, and then run through the other train station to make it to my train on time. It was crazy, but I somehow managed to make it to my train. Silly Anisha!

So, travels were great, and to top it off- I found a new place to live! I am so thrilled! I move today and tomorrow! I'm also going back to Delhi this week, and if tickets work out, I have lots of fun plans for the next 2 months... more details to come soon...

More rambling...
Other stuff- I am becoming increasingly convinced that I am not suited to work in the field of public health, or at least the way I am doing it right now. I am becoming very frustrated by the process of working with the Indian government and dealing with local NGOs. Everything comes down to money, and I feel like the idealism and desire to do good that many people have when they enter this field is constantly compromised and possibly destroyed at some point. I've met some amazing people who manage to do great things in spite of all the barriers, and I am trying to learn from their examples, but I wonder if I would be useful in another area of public health...

i am anisha, hear me roar!

2007-05-01T11:06:00.000+05:30

I think India is trying to piss me off and force me to leave- I had sunstroke 2 weeks ago. That was annoying. This week I have prickly rash, which I found out is associated with sunstroke and basically means that I am developing little itchy red bumps all over my body. I'm allergic to India. The doctor's recommendation- avoid tropical, humid places. period. right. good. really good. We've also been losing power at my place at least twice a day, so not only is there no AC (I'm American, I need AC!), but the fan is completely useless if there's no electricity. oy! Oh, and as my Hindi gets better, I get picked on more and more for speaking with an accent. Sweet.

But, I am determined to stick it out.

Good stuff- my friend is coming to L from Delhi to hang, and then we're going to Amritsar! I've rediscovered gchat, so I'm getting updated on life back home, which is fantastic! I finally found a tailor I like- he calls me baby ji. I love him! AND- I have the entire upstairs fridge in my house to myself. My first personal fridge (that isn't like 1 cubic ft)! I've always wanted to have one!

half hearted post

2007-04-27T17:03:00.000+05:30

i am writing this post because sarasa bugged me to update my blog- i can't say i have a lot of interesting news or things to say, but i will make a genuine attempt! so the past couple of weeks have been a little crazy and strange. i'm working on the project with a delhi-based ngo, which has been somewhat frustrating because the government of this state is so ridiculous, but i am hopeful that things will work out in the end. i will be less vague about that when stuff finally comes together!

india is getting super hot, which is good and bad. good, because the heat means that mangoes will soon be available in the markets, which is SO exciting. but, it's also hot, so that's not quite as exciting. i might be shifting houses, because my place doesn't have AC, and i actually managed to give myself sun stroke (aka heat stroke).

other good things- i've learned how to cook okra one way. i've discovered kesar pista milkshakes (saffron and pistachio flavors). i had my first webcam/skype conversation the other night with frank. i bought a pink sari. i'm going to amritsar next weekend to see the golden temple. i'm trying to plan a trip to the mountains in 2 weeks if i can convince some poor soul to accompany me.

Trek to South India and back

2007-04-06T07:12:00.000+05:30

My sister was nice enough to come all the way to India to hang out with me for 2 weeks, so I took it as a chance to travel a bit. We went from Delhi to Goa to Kerala to Delhi to Lucknow and then back to Delhi again. It was so fun! I thought I would include some pics and stories for my loyal fans! jk jk!

So, Goa... not as pretty as we had expected. It's a super popular tourist spot, and I imagine it's really fun on New Year's Eve or during spring break, but it's just not that pretty! The water was pretty dirty in north and south Goa, and the food wasn't that good since it wasn't veggie friendly. on a positive note, I got to drink lots of lime sodas, which is my favorite drink in India! It's like carbonated water with fresh lime juice, salt and pepper. Sounds gross, but it's really good! The other great thing about Goa is that we went to this really fancy hotel to eat, and I got to eat Thai food for the first time in months, and we got brownie sundaes for dessert! I was in heaven!

Ok, moving along in the journey, we took a train to Kerala which was so annoying because the travel agent who had booked our tickets had mistakenly written my sister's gender as male. now, normally that wouldn't be a big deal, but seeing as this is india, and everything ends up being a pain in the ass when you really just want to take a nap, i had to fight with the train conductor, buy the ticket again and pay a fine. either way, we made it to kochi in one piece. then we met our driver. he spoke no english. no hindi. only malayalam. oy. that was a HUGE problem. anyway, we went to munnar first, which has all these lovely tea plantations and spice plantations. it smelled like tea and cardamom for 2 days, which i was so happy about!

So this is a snapshot of a part of the tea plantation. I was pretty amazed by how extensive the fields were, and I believe they are primarily owned by the TATA company. We also had the most incredible dosa, uttapam, and chutneys in munnar. if anyone has recipes for that amazing mint chutney, coconut chutney, and tomato chutney that is used in south indian cooking, please send them my way! The other entertaining thing we realized while we were in Munnar is the cult of Lonely Planet. Now, I've never realized this before, because I haven't traveled abroad prior to this, expect for family vacations to India when I was a kid. But now that I've been traveling a bit, I'm starting to realize that this book has such a cult following- it's crazy! We kept seeing/meeting all these non-Indians in Goa and Kerala who were carrying these huge backpacks and holding their LP book grasped to their chest like their travel Bible. And though I understand that the book gives a good rough description of lots of different places and gives people ideas on where to go which can be a difficult task for foreigners to a country, it is still super entertaining to see these people who only stay in LP recommended places and only eat at LP mentioned restaurants. In honor of the LPers, I've included the picture of a birkenstock footprint, which we saw everywhere! Does anyone else remember that NYTimes article about birkenstock company and how much they enjoyed and appreciated that hippie-dippie, tree-hugging association with their shoes? These LPers are never ending free advertisements for them!

After Munnar, we drove to Thekkedy, which was, well, kinda lame to be honest. We wanted to see a spice plantation, but we ended up in this place which we thought looked like someone's personal garden, and then they tried to sell us massage oil. Very strange...

After that, we went to Alleppy, which was soooooooo pretty and lovely. Alleppy is known for its backwaters, which is basically a series of canals and waterways that are lined with coconut trees and lotus flowers and villages. amazingly beautiful. we were lucky enough to take a boat ride around sunset, and there was a brief thunderstorm while we were on the water which made the scene even more picturesque! Not to sound super touristy and like one of those damn lonely planet types that my sister and i despise, but it is pretty amazing to see people using canoes as their mode of transportation and the canal water as their bathing water. there was just something about our being on a motorized boat watching people canoe past us with wood and leaves to build their houses that made the whole experience seem very unreal. We also stayed at this cute little place in the middle of a lake. We went paddle boating one morning, and ate lovely keralan cuisine, which I loved. I should have been born in kerala.

After Alleppy, we went to Kovalam, which had such pretty beaches. Now, I know people say these beaches are commercial and touristy, but I say, ignore them, because they were so beautiful. clear water, white sand, so pretty. It was such a relief to see this pretty beach area after seeing the ugliness of Goa! The waves were also super big and kinda scary because they had such a strong pull. Needless to say, my sister and I were super wimpy and stayed along the coast since neither of us is a super great swimmer (sarasa i need more swimming lessons!) I included a picture of the beach and a shot of the outdoor restaurant where we had dinner the night we were in Kovalam. I got to eat bok choy in India on the beach on a full moon night with my sister! Does life get any better than that?

After our touristy trek through Kerala, we returned to Delhi, a place which my sister and I both love! We ate lots of food at Haldiram's, shopped, and went to see my sister's first Bollywood film in India this trip. We saw Namastey London, which I had already seen, and was dying to see again. It is such a terrible movie that it is actually good. SO good. It's got all these Indian patriotism undertones which would have annoyed me had I been in the states, but since I'm in India and the crowd was cheering and hooting- it just seemed so right and so fabulous!

Now that I'm back from my lovely vacation through Western South India, I am ready to work on my project and hopefully find a way to make myself useful- more work related posts to come soon (i hope!)

Parwal Sabzi

2007-03-21T21:42:00.000+05:30

At the risk of being accused of turning this into another food blog, I'm posting pictures of the dinner I made tonight because I'm so proud of the dish! I cooked stuffed parwal- parwal is a green vegetable known as pointed gourd in English. Parwal is a very healthy vegetable, and I've always thought it tasted pretty healthy too! They look like a cross between squash and baby cucumber. I've never really liked this vegetable, but they looked so pretty and fresh at the vegetable market that I had to buy some. I came home and found a recipe for stuffed parwal, which, much to my surprise, turned out really well!!

Stuffed Parwal

1. Cut off the ends of the parwal and make a slit through the middle of the parwal without slicing the vegetable in half. Scoop out the insides and save. Boil these shells in salted water until you can easily pierce the skin with a fork.

2. While the parwal shells boil, make the stuffing. Saute the insides with chopped onions, garam masala, ground cumin, chopped green peppers, chili powder, salt, and amchoor (mango powder).

3. Strain the shells. Stuff. Shallow fry in mustard oil in a frying pan until the outsides are slightly browned.

4. EAT!!

The cool thing about stuffing parwal is that there are tons of options for what you can put inside. I think the parwal would taste fantastic with tomatoes, or paneer. The cook in my house suggested using a toothpick or white thread to hold the parwal together while sauteeing in the final step, so they don't fall apart. Good idea!

Now that my camera is back...

2007-03-20T20:51:00.001+05:30

I finally got my camera back, so I want to post some pictures that I took today of... food!

Here's the chocolate pie one of my housemates made, which was sooooooo good... I included the recipe too, which she hopefully won't mind my sharing!

1. Blend together the following ingredients:
1 package silken extra firm tofu (light, 12.3 oz)
1 cup creamy peanut butter
1 tsp vanilla
2 tbsp cocoa
2 tbsp instant coffee (or cinnamon)
soymilk, if need to blend the ingredients

2. Make the crust by crushing cookies (graham crackers) with oil and margarine (butter can be used too, but my housemate is vegan, so she didn't use butter). Press into pie pan.

3. Melt chocolate and pour over the crust.

4. Add mixture from step 1. Refrigerate.

I've also become obsessed with papaya in the last 2 days, so I thought I would share a picture of my favorite fruit with everyone (the little pink specks are kala namak, black salt). Following that is a picture of my newest friend in Lucknow...

Chikoo

2007-03-18T21:09:00.000+05:30

I have found a new fruit, well, not exactly found in the sense that I discovered this fruit, but I mean, I tried a new fruit. It's called chikoo; it's brown and round, kinda like me! It looks pretty ugly, and that's probably why it's taken me so long to try it. I thought it was just a squishy potato when I saw it at the fruit stalls! It tastes like a cross between a pear and a kiwi, with a dash of cinnamon. Chikoo has a grainy texture, which I generally don't like, but it works in this fruit. It also has a big black seed in the middle and that's it, so there's none of that annoying seed picking business.

I also bought a papaya today, my first personal papaya! I'm determined to try every fruit and vegetable that I haven't seen before!

Besides my fruit/vegetable buying spree, I wandered around the city today, and I've been working on creating a proposal for adolescent life skills education in India. I think this might be something I'm interested in working on in the future...

Frustrations with People in Power

2007-03-17T17:59:00.000+05:30

I've had an extremely frustrating/rewarding two days. I've been trying to find contacts at local schools where I can distribute my questionnaires to students and teachers, and since I have a contact at the secondary education department, I thought it would be pretty simple to get the names of schools. I was so unbelievably wrong- the director of this department informed me that no school list existed in UP, because there was no need for such a list. I was like, "um, are you kidding me?" and he was like, "that's how it is." he then proceeded to walk away and then drove away as I stood there with my mouth still open in shock. I talked to my contact person at the department immediately after- she informed me, quite condescendingly, that there was no need to do my type of research, that it had been done, but she understood that i wanted to just poke around because I am young and starting my career. I wanted to slap her. twice. and then she looked at me and said, "i think you've become disturbed. it's ok. i will give you the name of 5 principals. ok?" I seriously had to restrain myself from yelling at her. oy.

The whole situation was absurd, especially because that contact person had offered to help me earlier, and was now backing out because she was afraid of being affiliated with anything remotely controversial. Though I understand her fears, at the same time it is rather hypocritical to be working on HIV education, while simultaneously interfering with someone else's work on the same topic. People at the government level have been so unhelpful and I feel like I wasted so much time during my first 2 months here because I was going from one office to another without actually getting anything done. Paper pushing, making baseless statements, wasting money, short sightedness - all of these things are blindingly obvious reasons for the lack of improvement in the HIV situation in UP. I feel like a lot of these people either don't care at all, or if they once cared, they have abandoned their own views for the sake of a job or for the sake of making someone else happy. Instead of acknowledging ideas and possibilities that can benefit their cause, so many of these people are restricting themselves to predetermined plans that have proved ineffective and a waste of money.

I was reading this article in the NYTimes today about John McCain's inability to answer someone's question about his position on using tax money to subsidize condom distribution in Africa. His answer was that he had to check his voting record and with his aides. Now, though I understand there are all sorts of issues in politics with maintaining consistency, and though I don't expect every politician to know about every issues and I realize that relying on political aides is a reality, I am still so bothered by the fact that he didn't have an opinion on this issue. If he can't say with conviction what he thinks, if he is relying on predetermined positions on various topics, than what truth is there to his opinions. There is no truth, and I feel like I need to question the strength of his character for this mistake. Harsh, I know, but I've dealt with ridiculous government officials the past few months, and I feel like there are so many problems that are not being resolved because many of our government officials (India and USA are all I know) do not have the strength to fight for their beliefs. It's frustrating. Again, I realize that my political analysis is at the surface level, and there are many places where it could be critiqued, but I just feel really strongly about the importance of having strong leaders who have a clear idea of what they believe and want to accomplish.

However, referring to some less negative thoughts- I was able to meet with several members of the positive network in the city, and they are amazing people. They have put up with so much stigma and hardship, yet they continue to work towards their goal of educating people and improving the lives of other HIV positive people. I'm really looking forward to collaborating further with this NGO....

Fulbright Conference Recap

2007-03-15T23:02:00.000+05:30

I just spent 4 days in Aurangabad, Maharashtra at the 2007 Fulbright Conference, and I had such a lovely time! It was really nice to meet a bunch of other Fulbrighters and to hear about all their projects and experiences. We went on a tour of the Ajanta Caves on Wednesday and the Ellora Caves earlier today (Thursday)... since my camera is broken, I don't have any pictures of my own, but I will hopefully be sent pics soon, so I will post pics as soon as I get them! I loved the Ellora Caves because they were all stone carvings and pretty impressive detail work, whereas the Ajanta Caves were primarily focused on faded paintings, so I wasn't super impressed. Also, the Ellora caves featured Hindi temples, Buddhist sites, and Jain temples, whereas the Ajanta Caves were only Buddhist, which I don't find super interesting. Ok, so much work to do tonight and tomorrow, so I'm going to sleep. Hope everyone is doing well!

aloo bhaigan methi sabzi and anisha's big day of food

2007-03-07T18:46:00.000+05:30

today i made a really good dish, which i am very excited about, so i'm posting the picture of the veggie dish next to the rice biryani i made! it's kinda blurry because i took it with the webcam, but you can the general idea. it's a dish made with potato, eggplant, and dried fenugreek leaves. i also bought my first watermelon today! it was so pink and so sweet... yum. i can't wait until mango season... i am going to make mango shakes and eat mango for breakfast everyday! i also had malai cham cham for a snack today, which is basically like the spongy cake made out of milk, covered with a really rich cream coat, pistachio pieces, and saffron. good food day today!

project stuff... i'm getting a little nervous about giving out my questionnaires, because i'm worried that there will be strong protests and objections. i'm trying to decide whether or not i should even show it to the people i am asking for school contacts. on the other hand, if the questions are soooo lurid, which i don't think they are, maybe i should modify them. i don't know. thinking....

Holi hai!

2007-03-06T20:23:00.000+05:30

I went to my uncle and aunt's house for holi, which was nice. there are 6 kids in the house, 3 sister-in-laws, 3 cousins, in addition to my aunt and uncle, so there was lots of noise and chaos at all times! on sunday, i played rang with my cousins, which is a tradition in india where people throw colored powder and colored water on each other. what i didn't realize was that the color stains your skin and finger nails, so though i enjoyed the holiday, i'm currently taking 3 showers a day trying to get the pinkish glow off of my skin! my cousins went a little crazy attacking me, so i had many many layers of colors to wash off! i actually just painted my nails, because i couldn't bear to look at the pinkish color on my nails any longer! my digi is in the shop, but i managed to reinstall my webcam, so here's a pic of my lovely nails!

other stuff... my project is getting interesting. i'm learning a lot just by putting the pieces of my research work together. to explain... i've redeveloped my thesis so i can focus on understanding the sexual attitudes and behavioural practices among adolescents. to do so, i've developing a questionnaire and focus group discussion questions. i put together an english version, but i also need a hindi version since some of my target population will be more fluent in hindi than english. since i brought my work with me to raebareilly over holi break, i decided to ask my relatives to help me with the translations. my cousins are pretty young, so i had them translate the more PG stuff- things about name, age, gender, religion, etc. but then, i obviously have lots of questions about sexual behavior, use of protection, etc. so i asked my bhabhis (sister in laws) which was so unbelievably embarrassing and uncomfortable. but, after a few questions passed, we (me, my 3 bhabhis, and my aunt) ended up having a really good discussion about the importance of educating adolescents in a way that they can use the information and apply it to their lives. we also talked about how schools are a great medium for this education because the likelihood of having these discussions in a typical indian household are pretty slim. i was really impressed by how open minded my relatives were especially considering their conservative upbringing. once they got over their initial embarrassment and once i explained why i was asking such explicit questions and my ultimate goals for developing an appropriate way to educate adolescents that is both useful and conducive to the community norms, we were able to move past the initial tension that emerged when i first began asking all my sex questions! it gives me hope that other people i will be meeting, will also be as open-minded. perhaps it will take some time, but i hope that at the end of the day, people will think in the best interests of their families and children. fingers crossed as always...

Quick Update

2007-03-02T08:54:00.000+05:30

Lots of things have been going on, which I would love to ramble on about for a while, but this is going to be quick, since my uncle and his driver are about to pick me up to go to their house to celebrate Holi. I went to Delhi on Sunday and came back on Tuesday, which was a super short trip, but it was really nice to have a change of scenery. I actually went with the purpose of attending a meeting on Monday in Delhi, but I also ended up visiting Haldiram's to get some of my favorite dessert (sandesh, a Bengali sweet which can't be found in Lucknow), some touristy shopping for fake watches and gaudy accessories, and a dinner trip to Saravaanas (the original of the one on Lexington and 27th in NYC!) And, I managed to get to the train station and back, which is exciting, because I've always had this horrible fear of being kidnapped or mugged in Indian train stations. I did have a minor mishap in Delhi, where the man who was supposed to pick me up did not show up and I had to wander around the New Delhi train station at night, by myself. On the plus side, this really nice lady asked me if I was OK, and her son was going to get me a prepaid auto taxi. So, I was sort of comforted even though I was extremely annoyed this guy was a half an hour late. oy. Other than that, I had a nice trip!

Ok, other stuff, went to this State Meet thing sponsored by the UP State AIDS people and UNICEF, which was amazingly interesting and I got to drink lots of chai out of those clay mugs, which I adore. I also made friends with this joint director lady, who I officially love, and will probably be super useful in the upcoming weeks. I met her twice before, but I was convinced she didn't like me, but I'm starting to understand her personality, and I think she's going to be a fantastic resource now that we've bonded! So, good things are happening....

And I'm going to Aurangabad for a Fulbright conference next Sunday, and then when I get back, a week later, my sister is coming to India! and Sarasa is coming in April too! woooohoooo!!

ps When I get back from holi, I will definitely elaborate on the State Meet.... really interesting stuff...

Project Update

2007-02-22T22:54:00.000+05:30

I just realized that I haven't really written about my project in a while, and I want to share the good news, since things have been going really well recently. I went to a three-day workshop at a local school which I talked about briefly in an earlier post- on the third day of the workshop, I gave the girls a brief questionnaire about sex and AIDS knowledge. I was blown away by the low levels of knowledge they had, even after the workshop. Also, the embarrassment associated with these topics really worried me, because if these girls can't talk about these issues with their friends and other women, then how are they going to protect themselves from an abusive HIV positive husband who is forcing them to have unprotected sex? (that is, of course, a worse case scenario) Really interesting stuff to think about. I actually rewrote my Fulbright proposal over the past two days, because my original proposal was derived from Western thought, which is not useful in the Indian context.

I also had some long talks with people working for the UP State AIDS Control Society about public health issues and general maladies in the country. Fascinating stuff... will ramble more later.

I managed to get myself invited to an AIDS conference in Lucknow at the Taj Hotel (nice hotel!), so I'm excited about that, and I also have a pending invite for a state training program in two weeks. The public health world in India is really small, so fingers crossed that I make some good contacts and that I am able to establish friendly relationships with people I meet at these programs!

Quacks and Psychics

2007-02-22T19:35:00.000+05:30

Before coming to India, I decided to take yoga classes, Hindi classes, and dance classes. I'm still working on finding a good dance teacher, but I managed to find a great Hindi tutor, and I signed up for a month of yoga classes. Now, I should have realized that I was going to dislike these yoga classes from the my first visit to the Institute- there was persistent interrogation of my health problems, comments made about my weight, followed by a refusal to let me watch 5-minutes of the class. Nonetheless, I forced myself to sign up for a month of yoga lessons in hope that I will learn to be patient, how to relax, and more serene, perhaps. Six classes later, I've decided that this class is making me tense! It's actually kind of entertaining now that I think about- the first day I was only allowed to do five minutes of breathing, the second day I was allowed to breath and stretch for 5 minutes because doing more than that might result in strained muscles which is absurd, because I wasn't using my muscles! Now, to be fair, I realize that a lot of people come to these classes with preexisting medical conditions- heart disease, diabetes, obesity, and I also applaud their efforts to exercise and take control of their bodies. However, I think the Institute's claim that they can cure cancer is a bit excessive. Anyway, I'm trying to be patient and open minded, but today, they informed me that they are reducing the number of repetitions I am allowed to do, because they (the all mighty yoga instructors) have decided they want me to be fatter, so I am not allowed to do much physical exertion. That defeats the point of these classes.... So strange. (the top picture is what i want to be doing, but the second picture exemplifies what I'm actually doing- lying around and breathing five counts)

So that was the quack portion of this post. The psychic portion, which I suppose is also about a quack, happened when I was returning from yoga class. My rickshaw guy (pic of rickshaw shown to the side) was bringing me home when he suddenly turned around and said he could tell I was going to be successful because of something he read in my forehead. Then, when we got to my place, he asked me for more money for some wedding or something, and I was kinda creeped out, so I gave him a little extra. And then, he proceeds to read my hand and tell me that I am going to marry outside of my caste and have an amazing husband or something. And I was like, dude, don't talk to me about love and relationships, tell me something useful about my career. He was like, you're going to successful, and then he proceeds to stare at my forehead again. And then he started asking me for food and I got scared and scurried away. Strange...

Sweet Tooth

2007-02-20T18:01:00.000+05:30

No matter where I go in Lucknow, I always seem to pass by a sweets shop on my way home. So, I have taken advantage of the proximity of these places, and the easily loosened drawstring waistband on my salwar suits to eat lots of sweets everyday. So, my three sweets of the day are kesar peda, illaichi peda, and kesar roll. Kesar is saffron and illaichi is cardamom (a very common seasoning in chai and Indian cooking), and peda is a traditional dessert made out of khoya (milk that has been slowly heated until it has evaporated into a solid chunk), sugar, nuts, and cardamom. It is super yummy! In the picture to the left, the yellowish circles are saffron and the creamish circles are cardamom flavor. I've had these treats many times before, but I still love them!

The new dessert I tried today was the saffron roll, I took a picture, but it's kinda blurry, since the picture didn't focus right (I think my camera needs to be fixed). I'm posting it anyway, so you can get a rough idea of what it looks like. This one tastes just like the peda, so it's super creamy and sweet, but it has a fuller/milkier flavor.

These are my favorites Indian sweets right now, but I've also been trying lots of flavors of ice cream, and my favorite at the moment is kesar pista, which is saffron/pistachio flavored ice cream. It comes in a pretty orange color!

Fruit dessert!

2007-02-18T23:00:00.000+05:30

So I'm obsessed with buying veggies from the open air markets, but today, I forced myself to buy some bananas, because I haven't been eating any fruits, which is strange, because the fruits are so sweet and yummy here. Anyway, today after dinner I really wanted something sweet, but I had already eaten my secret stash of chocolate, and I didn't have any sweets left in the fridge. So, I googled "banana dessert" and I found a recipe for Kluai Buat Chi, which is a Thai dish for bananas cooked in coconut. So, I didn't have coconut milk, but I improvised and made a super tasty dessert. Basically, I boiled milk with desiccated coconut, sugar, a pinch of salt, and then added slightly unripened bananas cut lengthwise, boiled the bananas until they softened and ate with a spoon. It was super sweet and delicious. I think it would have tasted even better if I had put vanilla ice cream on top! Yum!

PS I plan to start taking pics soon, because I realized how boring this blog looks! Sorry! Will fix soon!

Learning Curve

2007-02-18T21:45:00.000+05:30

I found myself getting frustrated with bureaucracy and the seemingly slow pace of public health work in India, but I'm starting to understand that my experience here isn't really about doing good or being useful during my six months. Rather, it's more about taking away an understanding of how to deal with the many issues that I've faced and becoming tolerant of/productive in spite of the barriers. For example, yesterday, I administered a survey to a group of high school girls studying at a government high school in Lucknow. I compiled the answers today, and realized a couple things:

1. The girls have a technical understanding of sex, AIDS, RTIs, but they lack contextual understanding or pragmatic knowledge for the use of the information.

2. I think the girls answered the questions in groups, because the answers were exactly the same in multiples of 3 or 4, and the girls sat on the classroom benches in groups of 3 or 4. So, I interpret this finding as the girls (ages 16-18) being uncomfortable having to personally answer sex-related questions. If the girls are uncomfortable answering anonymous yes/no questions (aka do you know what aids is?), how can they be expected to openly discuss their emotional/sexual problems with husbands or doctors?

3. Maybe sexual health shouldn't be the focus, instead, maybe the educational timeline should be a general hygiene education at an early age, followed by discussion of gender issues in middle school, followed by sex education. It just seems to me that there is no point in telling people about AIDS risks when they don't have the proper tools or "life skills" to deal with the circumstances and conditions that would put them at risk for contracting AIDS or other STDs.

I'm administering a modified version of my questionnaire to a group of teenage boys, and I'm super curious to see the difference in answers. I have a feeling the boys will be more frank about their knowledge, as previous studies indicate.

Realization

2007-02-13T19:17:00.000+05:30

the past 2 days have been super busy and really interesting for me. yesterday, i met with the people at UP State Aids Control (UPSACS), which oversees the national AIDS program work at the state level, and i met with people at UNICEF Lucknow. the UPSACS meeting was somewhat disillusioning, because the people weren't as passionate as i expected. nor were the people at UNICEF. the state people seem to have a very fixed idea of how they are going to deal with educating adolescents in UP, and that plan doesn't include non-school going children, which is very high rate, nor does it include non-government schools, nearly half the school going population. they also have a highly "structured and organized" system, bureaucratic and unnecessary in my opinion, for training teachers. i got the same information from the UNICEF people, but they gave this genius explanation that urban children don't need as much education as rural children, because they are being educated by the media- aka bollywood and television. do we really want indian mtv teaching children about sexual behavior?

so, it was definitely interesting to hear what these groups are doing, and i really don't mean to be as critical as it seems. i appreciate their efforts to educate, but i just question the effectiveness of their well intentions. i feel like they need to take a more creative approach to education- instead of lectures during biology class, they could try peer education and group discussions. i have read that these methods are more effective than traditional teacher lectures, and after i spent the day in a high school watching one of these classes, i feel even more strongly about this peer based/discussion based format. i went to an 11th grade class with a medical school faculty member and 2 medschool interns, and the interns and i watched the faculty member teach the kids. the positive things about this class: there was an emphasis on building life skills, they had an anonymous question box, the medschool faculty teacher was very friendly and honest. the negatives: the students' regular teachers were completely disinterested and dismissed the class early because they (the teachers) wanted to go home, the program was structured to be a full day of lecture which got very tedious by the end, the interns didn't do any peer educating (they just sat in the back and passed out papers)

so, my thought is that there are so many ways to get to these children and the fact that the educators have been able to convince schools to let them teach in them in a huge step! but, i feel like there are some areas that require some reevaluation:

1. peer education needs to be given priority
2. teachers need to care about the well being of their students and emphasize the importance of this education in their regular classes
3. there needs to be a system in place for teaching kids in non-gvt schools
4. the gvt needs to shift some of their attention to non-school going kids, or mandate primary and secondary education so all kids have equal access to basic information

so, those are my thoughts on the last two days. there were some other issues with rural/urban dynamics, but i'll save that for another post! the crucial lesson is that i need to remain cognizant of the fact that all these groups and people want to resolve the AIDS issues. So, even some of the programming and attitudes don't seem ideal, everyone has the same goal of curtailing the spread of AIDS. i definitely need to keep reminding myself of that.

also, there was a single quote on the wall of the school i was in today, which i also need to always remember:

"an ounce of practice is better than a ton of theory"

more birthdays!

2007-02-11T12:25:00.000+05:30

happy birthday to my suiteys, kimbo (on the 7th) and debbi (on the 10th)!

laptop woes

2007-02-08T18:26:00.000+05:30

My computer stopped working yesterday, but I called a tech guy last night and he came this morning to fix it. I'm amazed that he was able to fix the mess I made, reinstall all my programs, and give me additional programs within 4 hours and for only 450 rupees (about 10 dollars). Amazing. And now I can play my bollywood films on my comp! i'm going to attempt to play grey's too...

today is my off day from work, apparently!

birthdays!

2007-02-05T13:20:00.000+05:30

Happy Birthday Sarasa and Happy Belated Birthday Ashu Didi! I wish I could celebrate with you, but I'm counting on you both coming to India so we can celebrate over here too! A toast to two of my favorite people...

oy part II

2007-02-05T13:08:00.000+05:30

i actually have a really bad case of tonsilitis, probably caused by a bacterial infection. that's the bad news. the good news is that i met a ear, nose, throat specialist and he was pretty amazing. he diagnosed my condition in about 3 seconds, which i thought was pretty cool. i found out later, that he probably treats up to 150 patients PER DAY, and he only charges 70 rupees for a visit, which is less than 2 dollars. and, on top of that, he gave me the name of a pediatrican who might let me shadow him during his clinic hours and patient visits!

oy

2007-02-05T08:55:00.000+05:30

and im officially sick. i'm self diagnosing my illness as laryngitis- no voice, swollen throat, dry cough, inability to swallow.

ugh, this makes it very hard to work on my project today.

Movie Review

2007-01-27T14:40:00.000+05:30

I went to the movie theatre 3 times in the past 2 weeks....

1. Vivah
Bad, so so so so bad. It's basically just a really long engagement ceremony with a fire at the end. Nothing happens and the music is bad. Shahid Kapoor, with his cute face and great body, is the only reason I got through the movie without falling asleep.

2. Guru
A couple of good songs, decent story line, not bad overall.

3. Salaam-e-Ishq
The Indian version of Love Actually, but an hour and a half longer and every storyline has a happy ending. I liked the theme song, but that's about it. Oh, and John Abraham- I like him too! Way too long...

I am not Bihari

2007-01-27T12:48:00.000+05:30

My parents and I spent the past week in Bihar and Uttar Pradesh- we visited family, attended a wedding, and thoroughly wore ourselves out. Mom and I took a train from Lucknow to Jamalpur, the delayed train that I mentioned in my previous entry, but we went the wrong direction by mistake. So, instead of traveling down, we took a train traveled up to Delhi. Right after the train pulled away from the station we realized our mistake, but it was too late to get off. So, we had to get off in Kanpur at 1 AM, which was 2 stops away from Lucknow, to catch another train. We spent the entire night in the station which was absolutely filthy. It was possible the grossest place I have been in India- giants rats running around, tiny mice scurrying on my suitcase and dancing (literally) between my feet. Revolting. We managed to get tickets to another train leaving at 5:30 AM; it ended up leaving at 8 AM and we had to fight with the train master guy to get seats. Longest day ever.

So, the past week was really tiring, but I managed to enjoy my last night in Benares. We stayed at my uncle's house, and I told him I really wanted to eat chaat. Chaat is kind of like Indian dim sum, and Benares is famous for it. My uncle told me he would have all the supplies brought to the house so we could eat it at home. When I got home that night, one of my cousins grabbed my hand and told me we were going outside to eat chaat. I was so confused, but when we got outside, I found a chaatwalla, a man with a mini-chaat stand, outside the gate! My uncle had arranged for our dinner to be made fresh, by an expert, right outside the house! Definitely the best part of my trip!

On a project related note- I asked my two girl cousins what they knew about AIDS- one had never heard of it, the other knew it was a health condition, but didn't know how it was transmitted or what the risk factors are. Interesting. Both girls are being educated in the state of UP, which is where Lucknow is. What kind of so-called education on AIDS is the government actually providing?

Learning patience

2007-01-19T17:52:00.000+05:30

I am doing my best to remain calm, but I am starting to get annoyed/frustrated with the slow pace of life in this city... my train to Bihar is 15 hours delayed today, so my Mom and I spent the day aimlessly wandering around the city. Actually, I just got a call from my dad who informed me that the train might be 18 hours late. And yesterday, I had to take care of this stupid foreigner's registration thing, which involved my going to 4 different buildings around the city, walking back and forth between like 6 different rooms, having to go home to get more paperwork, and then spending another hour being interrogated by the officials. And on top of that, this woman with a clear case of menial job syndrome lectured my mom on how she has to register her presence in every city she travels to in India. Right, like she's going to waste 8 hours of her life every time she goes to a new city. Right. Oh! And all this happened after spending an entire day last week being sent from office to office trying to get this damn registration done.

I'm also realizing how difficult this project is going to be for a lot of reasons- people not returning emails is one problem. The other big problem is that I look really young and I'm a woman, so I'm not being taken as seriously as if I was a man or older. Of course I don't know if that's exactly the issue, but I've had most of my meetings with older Indian men, and I've been called "beta" (child) and "bachi" (little one or little child) enough times this past week to suspect this is the case.

Sorry for the rant, but I'm a bit frustrated.

To end on a positive note, I saw the movie Guru at the theater. I love going to the movies!

Reality

2007-01-17T20:55:00.000+05:30

I haven't written much about my project and research yet, because I'm still trying to figure out what I want to do with my time here and how to use it most efficiently and effectively. I had a meeting at KGMC with S. and A. who shared their experiences on working with HIV/AIDS programs and organizations.

The highlights of my meeting:

S.'s opinion is that the biggest problem is that men don't want to use condoms; he and I had a long discussion about how knowledge hasn't been converted into practice. I've heard the acronym KAP used several times, knowledge attitude practice, to describe the AIDS related programming and efforts taking place in UP. Again and again, I have been told that the knowledge is there, but the changes aren't taking place.
I've been told that it is impossible to collect data on sexual behavior in adolescents (aka pre college students). So the data that does exist is not accurate, and most likely fabricated figures

I'm beginning to wonder if my project thesis is actually relevant to the needs of the community. The awareness is supposedly there, but the outcomes are not. This leads me to wonder what kind of knowledge is actually being shared. If the "right" education is being provided, why isn't there change?

Day Trip to Rae Bareli

2007-01-16T23:25:00.000+05:30

One of my father's sisters lives in the town of Rae Bareli, which is about 80 km from Lucknow. We took a quick trip to visit the family, which was nice since I had never met any of them and my parents hadn't seen them in over 25 years! We ended up visiting on January 14 which is Til Sankranti, also known as Makar Sankranti, a celebration of one of the twelve movements of the sun. It marks the sun's journey into the Northern Hemisphere, and the date is based on a solar calendar so the date doesn't change every year, like Diwali or Holi. One of the most commonly celebrated traditions of this holiday is for people to consume food and desserts made of rice and til, sesame seeds, one of the favorite foods of the Sun God. The picture to the left was taken of the plate of desserts that were made at my aunt's house. The round desserts in the middle and the right are made of tan and black sesame seeds, respectively. My cousins also spent the day flying kites, which I was told is a common practice on this holiday!

Food blog?

2007-01-14T22:56:00.000+05:30

I finally got around to uploading some pictures I took from New Delhi, which are, conveniently, all pictures of food! I feel like there is no better way to describe my experiences in India than with descriptions of food. : )

My second night in Delhi, we were still super jet lagged, so we were wide awake at 3 AM. Instead of lying in the dark and trying to sleep, we ate a breakfast feast of Haldiram's sweet and savory treats! Haldiram's in a chain in India that makes sweets and savory snacks that can be purchased bakery-style, consumed in the store, or brought home in vacuum sealed bags. We ate there 3 times during our 2 days in Delhi! Here are some of my favorite treats!

A pic of everything we ate that morning:
Starting at the top: caju barfi, a cashew sweet with a thin layer of edible silver foil, dhokla, see below, muraba/peta, see below, sandesh, a very light milk based sweet with pistachio and saffron seasoning.

So my favorite thing was this savory snack (shown below) that is originally from the state of Gujarat, in western India. It is a variation of the traditional dhokla; it is made out of gram flour and rolled up like those pin wheels cookies, or like a cinnamon bun. The insides of the dhokla have coconut, mustard seeds, and coriander. It is SO good!
I also liked the sandesh, because it was super light and super tasty. It melted in my mouth- YUM! It also comes in many varieties, so I sampled cashew and other flavors the next day. My mom's favorite dish is peta, pictured below, which is made out of a fruit, I think. It is super sweet, so sweet that even I can't eat more than a bite at a time!

I'm here!

2007-01-12T08:55:00.000+05:30

I arrived in Lucknow on Tuesday morning after spending 2 days in New Delhi. My first reaction was, oh my god, how am I going to live here alone??? But, after 3 full days in the city, I'm starting to like, possibly love, Lucknow and the idea of living in India. I am living in a house with a woman, N., who rents out her rooms to foreign scholars. N. is really sweet and interesting, and she takes great of her lodgers, so I'm happy. It's also a really great living arrangement, because she and her "staff" take care of the cleaning, cooking (really yummy food!), and laundry. So basically, I do nothing, and I'm ok with that!

I had my first meeting with my research mentor at the University, which was really interesting for a lot of reasons. I am working with the head of a large department, so he has a lot of power and influence, which is apparent from his manner and the behavior of his staff. V. offered me the use of his car and his entire staff, and whenever I asked him a question about how things would get done or how I could arrange a meeting, he would say something like, "I will have it taken care of," or "It will get done for you whenever you need it." I felt like I was talking to the Godfather! The only problem with this situation is that since V. has such a high post, I feel like it is going to be difficult to have a really open discussion with him about my ideas and purpose for being here. From our meeting, I gather he had not read my proposal, so I am starting to realize that I might need to look elsewhere for mentorship or for guidance.

Speaking of possible mentors- I met another interesting person at the University by chance when I was sitting in the Department of Social Work waiting to meet a colleague. This professor, H., has spent his life doing social work and social planning, and apparently he had been sent a copy of my Fulbright proposal by someone, somewhere along the way. The first thing he said to me was something along the lines of, "I understand and agree with your idea that it is important to create theory from practice, rather than practice from theory." Amazing. He summarized my entire proposal and ideas for public health in that one statement. He was a very interesting man and I feel like his life experience and his initial willingness to listen to my ideas and to understand my POV will make him a great potential mentor. I am hoping that he will be able to give me ideas and possibly some direction for my project.

I also visited the King George Medical College today, which is a beautiful campus with tens of thousands of students. I met with the Head of the Department of Community Medicine who suggested that I visit some rural areas with the medical students, which I think could be a really great experience. I learned an important lesson from this meeting- I need to follow the lead of my mentors or the people I want to help me, because if I pressure them until they feel uncomfortable, I will most likely miss something important, either because the information will be withheld from me, or because in my eagerness to follow some self-defined path, I will completely miss another realm of possiblities. Lesson 1!

I'm also slowly starting to understand the social norms of this city, but since I'm American, I am often exempt from them. For example, whenever students entered V.'s office, they would touch his feet for a blessing and they would stand with their heads bowed in respect, while I was sitting/lounging in a chair sipping the coffee he had had brought in for me! It's an interesting dynamic being an Indian American woman studying in this traditional city- on one hand, my mentor is protective of me because I am a young foreign woman who needs to follow certain rules to get what I want out of this project, but on the other hand, I feel like a "fly on the wall," because, as an American, I don't have to follow the traditions.

More thoughts to come...

The Plan

2006-12-18T09:49:00.000+05:30

I am traveling to India to work on a public health project as a Fulbright Scholar. Starting in January 2007, I will be living, exploring, and working in Lucknow, a northern city in the state of Uttar Pradesh. My proposal pertains to addressing HIV/AIDS prevalence among adolescents living in Lucknow. I hope to study the work currently being done by the Indian government, domestic NGOs, and international AIDS organizations and donors on this public health problem, and to be a part of addressing the related issues.

I decided to start this blog because I hope to track my experiences and travels, and also because I would like to share my journey with friends and family. I know that using the word "journey" to describe my pending trip is rather dramatic and evokes stereotypical images of trekking across the globe. But, for me, I expect it to be a journey, venturing into uncharted territory, if you will. I also hope that this blog becomes a place for people to leave their thoughts, suggestions for things I can do or see, AND I want it to be a way for us to all stay in touch!